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You Know You’re An Air Force Spouse When….

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Originally published by NextGenMilSpouse on August 30, 2018

Some people say you become an Air Force spouse when you say, “I do.”

I don’t think that slipping on a wedding band makes you an Air Force spouse.

You Know You're An Air Force Spouse When

Sure, you become a part of the Air Force family but you aren’t fully immersed in the Air Force culture until you’ve spoken these five phrases. They are earworms that embed themselves deeply into your conscience.

When I was newly married to my airman, I swore that I wouldn’t succumb to these military terms. After all, the Air Force was his life and I had my civilian existence.

Eventually these five Air Force phrases weaseled their way into my daily vocabulary.

You too will have no choice but to surrender to the fact that you are one of us. It may take time, but you will get there.

You Know You're An Air Force Spouse When

You Know You’re An Air Force Spouse When You Find Yourself Saying These 5 Phrases

“Roger That”/ “Copy That”

This phrase is used to let the speaker know that you have understood what they said. It’s another way of telling them that the message was received. While it may be such a simple phrase, it is one that is effective in any situation.

 “Can you pick up my dry cleaning after work?”

Roger that.

“My new work number is 555-5555.”

Copy that.

You know you are an Air Force spouse when “roger that” becomes part of your regular speech.

“Standby”

This word is used to let someone know that you need a pause in the conversation.

Your airman will use it while on the phone to put someone on hold and I found myself using this more when I had kids. I would pair it with a hand gesture to accentuate the point.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve used this at work too. Of course, the receiver has no idea what I’m saying.

I’m not using “standby” to be rude.

It has just become a verbal tic for me.

“I’d like to make an appointment,” I tell the medic on the phone. He says “standby” because someone has approached the counter.

“Visual”

This phrase is an indicator that you have seen what is being pointed out. In Air Force-speak, there is a difference between seeing a “friendly” and an “enemy.” An enemy would be “tally.”

Most Air Force spouses will only use the term “visual” although I’m not sure why. There have been times where I used it to talk about someone I really didn’t want to see (Any of my friends who are reading this, I wasn’t talking about you).

And don’t think that you’ll only use it while driving. Oh no.

You’ll use it in all facets of life.

“I’m walking toward your building. Which one is it again?”

“The second one on the left.”

“OK. I have a visual.”

“Where is our daughter? Do you have a visual?”

“Not yet. Oh, wait. There she is.”

“Charlie Foxtrot”

This was one of my favorites as well as “SNAFU.” Most people realize that this is using the NATO alphabet to identify when something has gone horribly wrong.

In other words, it’s a clusterfuck.

You use “Charlie Foxtrot” to be more PC or if there are little ears around and you don’t want them to understand what you are saying.

I’ve been married to the military for far too long and so I used to use “SNAFU,” which is an acronym for “Situation normal, all fucked up.” That phrase was easy to use around children. They could glean what it meant but didn’t realize that the acronym used words that they shouldn’t say.

“Everything went wrong at work today. The whole day was a Charlie Foxtrot.”

“I hit a SNAFU during my presentation. It went downhill from there.”

Wild Blue Yonder

You have truly become enmeshed in the military lifestyle when you have memorized the words to the Air Force song. I don’t mean that you know the tune and you can follow along with the words in your program.

No, I’m talking full up memorization.

Bonus points if you add in the extra phrases that aren’t explicitly written in.

Extra points if you include the arm motions. If you have no idea what I mean, you’ve obviously just gotten married to an airman. Otherwise you know what these are and when to add them to the song.

The transformation from “married to the Air Force” to “fully submerged” may be quick or it may slowly seep its way in. Either way, welcome to the family. We’re glad you’re here.

We need people like you and you can totally sit with us!

Confession: PCSing is Bad for My Health

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Originally published by NextGenMilSpouse on April 2, 2018

There are many reasons peoplecomplain about PCSing. Some comment that the moves comes too frequently. Others bemoan the time and energy involved. Still more note that their household goods get ruined. Me? I find that I’m failing to take care of myself.

That’s why I’m declaring that PCSing is bad for my health!

I went to the doctor the other day for an issue with my foot. It had been a problem for a long while, so I finally did the grown-up thing and called to get an appointment. While there, I realized that my birthday was coming up and so I should probably schedule a mammogram. The first question they ask you is, “When was your last one?” I replied that it was last May. I thought I was doing pretty well considering it was October. But when the receptionist asked where I last had the procedure done, I realized that it was at our last base. And that means that it was more than a year and a half ago.

When I'm PCSing, there are WAY more pressing things to do than to find a doctor or schedule a dentist appointment.

The realization dawned on me that this is not the first time that my health care has gone by the wayside.

Every time I move, there are more pressing things to do than to find a doctor.

Where is the grocery store? Down the street. Is it closer than the commissary? Is it worth the drive? Starbucks? Gotta find the closest one!

But ultimately, I know that first and foremost is unpacking my household goods. I find myself putting items away at a blistering speed. I hate the sight of all those boxes and paper lying around the house. By the weekend, I’m pestering my spouse to hang pictures and curtains. If I had my way, every box would be unpacked by that first weekend.

Then I must enroll the kids in school. With that comes all the secondary tasks to go along with it. If it’s the summer, I have to still buy school supplies and new clothes. Like many of us, I wouldn’t buy notebooks and pencils beforehand because that’s just one more thing to pack or keep track of. Then there’s the job of keeping them occupied while I wait for school to start.

I also need to schedule THEM for a school physical and that is a herculean task considering all of the students who have been at our new location have scheduled their exam much earlier so the pickings are slim at the base hospital. Do I dare try a walk-in clinic or do I rearrange all those well-laid summer plans to take the first available appointment? Each time it seems like I make the wrong choice but c’est la vie! Check that box off!

Next on my list is finding a dentistfor the family. Here is where I find I can put myself in the mix. But of course, there are no appointments for a month out. Add that to the fact that it took a month or two to get to this point in my PCS move and I’m now three to four months past my regularly scheduled time.

But hey, that’s better than a year and a half, right?

Now the kids are in school, the house is unpacked, and I can go on with my life. When I worked full-time, the days were occupied with that and when I was done, I’d fill the rest of my time with the kids and their activities. Working part-time usually meant that I clocked in, worked, clocked out and then ran errands or volunteered until it was time for the kids to come home from school. When I was a stay-at-home mom, I filled my days with tasks that revolved around the kids.

In each scenario, I was my last priority.

Even though I nagged my spouse to see a physician at every issue, I didn’t do the same. Nor did I worry about yearly physicals for him since he is required to do so. I marked that as a small victory; I wasn’t responsible for that task.

When I'm PCSing, there are WAY more pressing things to do than to find a doctor or schedule a dentist appointment.

Just like the NyQuil commercial that says “Moms don’t take sick days,” I don’t take sick days. And since I don’t take time off for colds, I don’t go to the doctor often. That translates into never calling the doctor’s office.

And that means that I forget to make appointments for my well-being.

The only positive result of my neglect is that the American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists recommend that you get a pap smear every three years. But I can’t get too excited. They still require that I see my OB every year. My little victory is still a failure.

The moral of my tale is don’t be like me.

Moving around the country or the world is a great experience and I need to be healthy to enjoy it.

Next time I PCS, the order of importance is: Find a Starbucks, call the doctor, and then get to the commissary! (I can only improve so much.)