ordinary supergoddess

Water, Water Everywhere

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Water is everywhere, obviously. But did you ever REALLY think about it? I’ve been wandering around my new neighborhood and I am suddenly keenly aware that I love water.

The first morning I took my dog on a walk in the new neighborhood, I walked past a creek. As you know, I’m familiar with water around my neighborhoods but this time was different. This creek wasn’t just a creek, it was a babbling brook. There were flat rocks under the stream and so the sound was alive. It wasn’t rushing water but a much more pleasant sound. That sound soothes me.

As I continued on, there was that sound again. But this time there was no creek, no brook, no stream. There was simply a water feature in someone’s backyard. Again, it was a pleasant surprise. I very much like that sound.

That being said, I love water in it’s other forms too. In high school, I converted from soda drinking to water. I didn’t do it for the health benefits but rather because I hated feeling bloated all the time. It was a positive that I wasn’t burping all the time too.

The ocean is my biggest water love of all. The sound of the waves crashing on the beach; the smell of the salty air all combines to make a wonderful sensory experience. I never get enough of it but I crave it all the time. When we first arrived in Europe, my spouse had to go to The Hague for a work trip. The kids and I drove out there at the end and spent a few days at the oceanside. It was September in the northern part of the country and I insisted on getting my feet wet in the ocean. The kids laughed and thought I was crazy but it needed to be done.

I love cruising for that reason too. I enjoy visiting many countries and their beaches. And on the way, I’m on the sea. That’s one time that I fear the water. The ocean is beautiful on shore but scares me a little bit out in the wide space. There are creatures out there that can kill you. I know, I know. There are also dolphins and cute, little sea creatures but those don’t concern me. I don’t want to be like Louis Zamperini and be lost at sea for days on end. That holds NO appeal for me.

And it’s funny that only certain kinds of water make you have to go to the bathroom. That’s another type of water I don’t like. I don’t want overflowing rivers that can sweep you away nor torrential downpours that pelt you. I want controlled water. And my babbling brook will help keep me enjoying my morning walks with the dog. That’s water you can celebrate.

 

How do you deal with military ranks as a spouse?

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Thanks to Militaryspouse.com for publishing this article.

Pop quiz time!

Read the scenarios below and guess the answer.

You are at a squadron picnic where you have just PCSed. You are slightly apprehensive because you are meeting many new people. Your spouse points out her boss and is going to introduce you.

“Paul, this is Col. William. Col. William, this is my husband, Paul.”
Col. William says, “Nice to meet you Paul. Please call me Sarah.”

What do you say?

–

You have stopped into your spouse’s office to meet him for lunch. You see a young Airman with one stripe on his shoulder sitting at a desk. He says, “Hello, ma’am.” And then your spouse tells you that Airman’s first name.

How do you complete the introduction?

–

You are at a promotion ceremony and across the room you see a 4-star General whom you met when she was a Lieutenant Colonel. Back then, you called her by her first name, but now she is wearing stars on her shoulders. You turn to your spouse and ask him, “Do I call her Ma’am or by her first name?”

What is the correct answer?

–

You are at WalMart shopping for odds and ends when your spouse spots her Chief walking down the aisle toward you. Your spouse introduces you to Chief Barney. The Chief gives his first name.

How do you reply?

–

You are at a dining out. You are dressed to the nines and are feeling fine. Social hour is in full swing and as you step up to the bar to order a drink, you notice that the gentleman standing next to you is none other than the SACEUR (Supreme Allied Commander Europe). Your spouse says, “Hello Sir.” He says hello back. The SACEUR extends his hand to you and says, “Hello, I’m Philip and this is my wife, Cindy.”

How do you respond?

Answer key for all: You call the military member by their first name.

This is one of the areas of military protocol that I have a passion about.

There is nowhere that states that we have rank as military spouses. Because we don’t have rank, there is no hierarchy that we must adhere to. This means that you speak to people as if they are people, which they are.

Now that’s not saying that you can’t call someone “Chief” or “General” or even “Airman” but there is no penalty if you choose to call them by their first name. That is what their parents named them, after all.

There are a few exceptions to this “rule.”

Sometimes the service member may have a “call sign.” A call sign is a nickname given to rated officers during a naming ceremony. During that time, there is a group of people who decide on the new person’s nickname. It is usually an homage to a character trait or it coordinates with their first or last name. Once they are given their new name, they may choose to use it always.

For example, I have a friend who was named “Pumba” during his naming ceremony. He introduced himself by his call sign so I didn’t know his real first name until many years later. A reason for this may be that your significant other only knows that person by their call sign. So that is how you are introduced to them. Even today, it is funny to hear “Fuzzy’s” spouse call him “Ryan” because I can’t connect the two names to that one person. It takes a lot of mental math when speaking to family members about them.

The other exception is when a military member is attached to his rank. Sometimes this is a good thing and sometimes not. When I was first introduced to Chief Woolridge, our wing chief, he told me to call him “Avery” so I did. Most just called him “Chief.” After all, he’d earned that rank. I called him “Chief” but also by his first name because that’s who he was. He said that I was the first person in his career to call him by his name. I am still not sure if that was a good or bad thing.

But then there is the officer who give all officers a bad name. That’s the person who insists that you call them by their rank, no matter who they are talking to. I have only met one such person in our 24+ years of service. (Let’s say that we avoid that person as much as possible.) And that’s another etiquette lesson in itself.

The biggest takeaway from this is that while there are protocols in place for the military, there are no written ones for you as a civilian. Civility is your compass for all interactions. The hardest part is remembering someone’s name. And that may be where your only faux pas comes into play.